Open World p 17. Relationships. Speaking

1. Conversation: Talk about the following questions with your partner for about 3 minutes. The pictures are there to help you.

1.    What was the most important thing your parents taught you?

2.    Are friends the new family? Discuss.

3.    What are the main problems affecting families in your country/region at the moment? Is family breakdown an issue?

4.    Nowadays more and more people meet online. Do you think online dating can be successful? How is it different to traditional dating? Do you think you could meet your other half or significant other online?

5.    Is marriage a thing of the past? Why/Why not? Why are fewer and fewer people tying the knot nowadays? Why is the divorce rate so significant? What do you think can be done about forced marriages? What do you think about arranged marriages?

6.    What differences has technology made to people's ability to keep relationships going over long distances?

7. Describe the personalities of your family members. Are there any characteristics that run in your family?

8. What would you do if you found out that your partner was cheating on you? 

9. When you detect a conflict, how do you usually cope with it? 

10. Do you tend to "take the bull by the horns" or do you tend to walk away and hope that time will solve everything? 

  

2. Monologue: Below there are some issues related to the topic. You must talk about at least two of them for 2 minutes approx. You may be asked further questions about the topic when you have finished. 

STUDENT A
1. How has the idea of family size changed since the past century?
2. How has the concept of family structures changed over the last 30 years? Are nuclear families still the norm? What about same-sex families? Or childless families? What is your opinion regarding jigsaw or blended families? 

3. The trouble with most children nowadays is that their parents are too easy with them. Do you agree? What's the best way to raise your children?  

 

STUDENT B

1. What kind of problems can put a great strain on a relationship?  Think about someone who got divorced or split up. What turned their relationship sour?

2. Are there more benefits or drawbacks to living alone nowadays? Is it possible to be unattached and happy?

3. What is the best environment to raise a family in? 

 

PICTURES

·         jigsaw family/blended family:a family in which one or both partners have children from a previous relationship, in addition to any children they have together. E.g. Smash is staying with her mother for the holidays because her dad is on honeymoon with his new young wife. So I have a very modern blended/ jigsaw family.

·         adoption: the act of adopting a child.

·         birth parents: biological parents of a child.

·         custody: the legal right or duty to take care of or keep somebody/ something; the act of taking care of something/ somebody

·         foster care: a situation in which for a period of time a child lives with and is cared for by people who are not the child's parents.

·         pass a law: make something legal

·         extended family: it extends beyond the nuclear family, consisting of parents like father, mother, and their children, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

CONVERSATION

·         breadwinner /ˈbredwɪnə(r)/: a person who supports their family with the money they earn

·         provider:a person who supports their family with the money they earn

·         black sheep:a person who is different from the rest of their family or another group, and who is considered bad or embarrassing

·         role model:a person that you admire and try to copy

·         the apple of my eye:one's favorite person; the one you love most

·         close-knit: consisting of people who do a lot of activities together and look after one another. E.g. a close-knit family/ community/ team.

·         nuclear family: a family that consists of father, mother and children, when it is thought of as a unit in society. E.g. Not everybody nowadays lives in the conventional nuclear family.

·         breakdown/ˈbreɪkdaʊn/:a failure of a relationship, discussion or system. E.g. she moved to London after the breakdown of her marriage.

·         other half/significant other:one's wife, husband, or partner

·         tie the knot/get hitched:get married

·         empty nest syndrome: sadness or emotional distress affecting parents whose children have grown up and left home.

·         apron strings: influence or control that someone has over you because you are afraid of making your own decisions or of not doing what they say. E.g. be tied to someone’s apron strings (=be influenced or controlled by someone). Even at 25 Jenny was tied to her parents’ apron strings. cut the apron strings: to stop providing support. E.g. Sending kids to summer camps has been in decline in recent years, as parents have become less and less inclined to cut the apron strings

·         a match made in Heaven: A marriage that is likely to be happy and successful because the marital partners are very compatible.(idiomatic) A very successful combination of two people or things.

·         blood is thicker than water: family relationships and loyalties are the strongest and most important ones.

·         head over heels in love with: madly in love

·         to have a falling out with someone: to have a disagreement which ruins a relationship with that person.

·         rule the roost (Sp. nido): /ruːst/ (informal) to be the most powerful member of a group. E.g. Liverpool ruled the roost in English football for a decade. Ultimately, men still rule the roost and make more money. You just need to accept that your daughter is going to rule the roost for most of her childhood.

·         born with a silver spoon in their mouth: they were born into a wealthy and privileged family.

·         child support: Money that a non-custodial parent pays to the custodial parent for their child(ren)'s support.

MONOLOGUE

·         put great strain: to burden or overload someone or something

·         run in the family: to be a common feature in a particular family

·         turn sour /ˈsaʊə(r)/:become less pleasant; turn out badly

·         cheat on:to have a secret sexual relationship with somebody else

·         hit on sb:to start talking to somebody to show them that you are sexually attracted to them. E.g. Are you hitting on me? You're a married man!

·         hook up with sb: to meet somebody and spend time with them

·         take the bull by the horns:deal decisively with a difficult or dangerous situation.

·         dump sb /dʌmp/:to end a romantic relationship with somebody

·         have a crush on:a strong desire for another person

·         kiss and make up:to become friendly again after a fight or disagreement

·         on the rocks: a relationship or business that is on the rocks is having difficulties and is likely to fail soon. E.g. Sue's marriage is on the rocks.

·         whisper sweet nothings in (someone's) ear:to murmur words of affection to someone in a flirtatious manner. These words may be genuine or less serious. E.g. My ex-boyfriend used to whisper sweet nothings in my ear and then sneak out with his mistress later!

·         a chip off the old block: a person who is very similar to their mother or father in the way that they look or behave. E.g. Jimmy was a chip off the old block with his grey eyes and his dad’s smile.

·         like father, like son: said when a son takes after his father in mannerisms, interests, behaviour, etc.

·         cope with: To endure something, usually something unpleasant or undesirable.

 

Student A 

Sample answer

The topic I would like to discuss with you today is the one of family and relationships. More specifically, I would like to focus on an area that I consider particularly interesting. It is how the concepts of family and relationships in general have changed in our lifetime.

To start with, I would like to reflect on how families have evolved since the times of our grandparents. As strange as it might seem today, our grandparents' generation believed that having children meant an increase in their workforce and therefore they embraced the idea of having many of them. So, the more children they had, the more work could be carried out in the fields. As a matter of fact, my grandparents were farmers and all family members were supposed to lend a helping hand and shoulder the burden of the daily farm chores.

Nowadays, however, we tend to have fewer children. Evidently, we no longer see them as workforce. Quite the opposite, we have become aware that they need our constant attention and a lot of TLC (tender, loving care).  Additionally,  we also enjoy an extended life expectancy. People live definitely longer and this has of course influenced family structures. We even have coined a new term, the so-called  "Beanpole family", which describes a multi-generational family that is thinly stretched over several generations, with fewer family members in each generation and with growing numbers of single-parent families.

In addition to family size, a further point to discuss is family types. At the time of our grandparents you would just find the most traditional families. Our generation, on the other hand, has witnessed the emergence of a much wider range of family structures. A case in point is the single-parent families, which have become  more common in recent years. Another family type to consider is the rainbow families, which include same-sex families and gender-diverse families. Apart from these, there is also the blended family, a family consisting of a couple, the children they have had together, and their children from previous relationships. Finally, another family type that has gained prominence recently is the foster family, which takes a child into their home for a while and takes care of him or her. In any case, what we should bear in mind is that there is no such thing as 'normal' or 'abnormal' family structures – we are all equal and love is what really makes a family.

 

Another area to consider, is our children's upbringing. There are mainly two types of parenting, helicopter parenting and free-range parenting. In The former parents pay extremely close attention to their children's experiences and problems. And the latter advocates encouraging independence in children. These parents believe that over-protectiveness is a danger in itself. Indeed, a child who thinks he cannot do anything on his own eventually can't. As the popular saying goes "either if you say you can or you can't you are always right.

Obviously, these two types of parenting lead us to a dilemma. Are we living in a risk-averse culture where we stifle our children's ability to deal with danger by never allowing them to take reasonable risks? Does our society mollycoddle its children? Or do free-range parents expose their children to real and unnecessary danger? What do you think?

In conclusion, our generation has witnessed a major shift in not only the area of family size and structure but also in the emergence of unconventional family types. Likewise, today's parents are in a quandary over whether in our modern times  they should rear their children in a protective or permissive way. In any case, at this moment in time, we have all become perfectly aware that we are propelling our children to an unpredictable future.  So, as long as they have the skills to fend for themselves, we as a society should feel proud and contented.